Bereavement is the experience of losing someone close to us. Coping with the death of a loved one can be extremely difficult as you may be dealing with various emotions such as grief, finding it tough to process them and difficulties moving on. However, you are not alone and there is a wide range of support available.

Grief.jpgIt is important to remember that grief is a normal part of bereavement, it can make you feel many different emotions. These feelings are not wrong or bad, and there are no quick answers to how you may be feeling. Everyone copes with their grief and bereavement differently.  

Some of the most common symptoms involve: 

  • Shock and numbness - this is normally the first reaction to loss 
  • Anger - this may be towards the person you have lost or the reason for your loss 
  • Exhaustion or tiredness 
  • Guilt - for example feeling guilty about being angry, something you may have said or did not say, or not being able to stop your loved one from dying
  • Feeling overwhelmed with sadness and crying

There are five stages of bereavement or grief. These include:  

  1. Denial - feelings or confusion, shock or disbelief  
  2. Anger - for example, blaming yourself or others for your loss  
  3. Depression - you may feel tired, helpless or isolated  
  4. Bargaining - feelings of guilt and feeling like you could have done more 
  5. Acceptance - this is about accepting your loss and being ready to move forward  

For more information about what grief can feel like, visit the bereavement section of Mind's website.

  • Try talking to somebody that you trust; this could be a friend, family member, health professional or counsellor.
  • You could contact a support organisation, such as Cruse Bereavement Care, who will support and guide you to the most useful services available.
    • They have a helpline which you can call - 0808 808 1677.
  • If you have difficulty sleeping, the NHS Every Mind Matters website has tips on tackling insomnia.
  • You may want to consider peer support, where people use their own experiences to help each other. Find out more about this on the Mind website.
  • You can listen to free NHS mental wellbeing audio guides.  
  • The NHS website also includes six ways to feel happier.

Remember: grief can be unpredictable and bereaved people might react in ways they can't anticipate. Remember that every emotion is normal.

  • You can refer yourself for free psychological therapy, such as cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), through NHS Talking Therapies.
    • If you are registered with a GP in Birmingham, your local service is Birmingham Healthy Minds - call 0121 301 2525 or fill out their referral form.
    • If you are registered with a GP in Solihull, your local service is the Coventry and Warwickshire Health Mind Service - call 0247 667 1090.
    • If you aren't sure which area your GP falls under, look them up here.
  • Contact your GP if you are struggling to cope with stress, anxiety and if you have had a low mood more than two weeks.
  • Call 111 or ask for a urgent appointment if you require help but it is not an emergency.
  • If you or somebody requires immediate help, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E.
  • You can always call Samaritans, day or night, on 08457 90 90 90.

You may be able to get Bereavement Support Payment if your wife, husband or civil partner has died within the last 21 months. For further details, visit gov.uk. You can also call the Bereavement Service helpline on 0800 731 0469 (textphone 0800 731 0464).

You can seek further support and information from the following organisations: